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الموت لم يَكُن يومًا عقابًا، وإنما هو الخلاص. بوت؛ @Yourdarkfuckingside_bot
Love is just a potion that filled with poison, one drop and You're done for.
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"أحيانا، لا بأس أن تحدث الأمور من دون تفسير." هذا ما أُقنع نفسي به في كل مرة أجالسُ ذاتي، في كل مرة يتردد طيفك ذاكرتي، ربما أنا من كان المشكلة، كنتُ دومًا أعلم أنك راحل في النهاية، ولكن أظن أن عقلي لم يتقبل ذلك ورفض الفكرة، لما قد يذهب ونحن بهذا التفاهم؟ لما قد يرحل ونحن نتوهج هكذا كالنجوم؟ تعجُب وأستفهام كبير للأمر، وعندما حصل ورحلت، أنت لم ترحل وحدك، رحل معك الكثيرُ مني.
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Oh, I was never enough?
I thought I was all you wanted.
I thought I was the real thing between all the faux around us to you.
I wonder how we managed to end up doubting each other...
When all we needed before was our solo nights where all we could do was share unforgettable memories.
I wonder how exactly I turned from 'permanent' to 'optional'
And how our promises shattered below your feet!
With a blink of an eye...
What used to be everything
Became nothing.
This song talks about a girl named 'Daisy' whom she's in love with a serial killer named 'Max' so she starts to kill people in the hope he notice her, drowning in the desire for his attention she kills and kills until realization hits her that she's taking lives of innocent people.
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Life became either "I'm just a girl 🎀" or "now let me say I'm the biggest hater, I hate the way that you walk, the way that you talk___"
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I'm a self obsessed artist, a moody writer, a dreamy painter with so much thoughtful ideas yet a doomed passion.
I'm the problem and I'm the lost solution. I'm what I always wanted to be yet I despise who I became.
I'm an artist that can't live without the fantasy inside his head, that his reality will never provide.
I'm the waited star who could shine high in the deep darkness of this lifeless timeline.
I'm the plot of a complicated being.
I'm who I am.
I'll be that shadow larking around your memories, I'll be always there reminding you of the things you left behind, of the loyalty you betrayed, of the love you lost, of the stupidity of your choices, I'll always be there ،sealed, engraved on your being and you can do nothing about it.
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Drink me up
Smoke me out
Have me in anyway you want
Obsessively
I would take it as the fool
Like a happy pill
Poison me with the sweetest words
Ruin what left of my heart
At least I would feel
At least it would be you.
do you ever go:
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 men 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
but then:
💞💖💗💘💓💗💞💓💖💞💓💗💞💖💗💞💓💗💖💓💗FICTIONAL MEN💞💘💗💞💘💞💖💗💞💓💘💞💓💗💖💓💖💞💓💞💗💞💗💖💕💞💓💖💗💘
I let you know me.. See me, I let you touch the depth of my soul, I allowed you to sink deeply into my heart and I gave you everything I could possibly give. Only for you to throw it all away like I'm some disposal object and I'll never forget that.
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I wander if your memory recognize me anymore, or did I fade along the line?
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"It's like we're bound to be with whoever breaks us"
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Happy birthday to the best, most beautiful girl in the world 🎀
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You are the saddest part of me
A part of me that will never be mine
Girl dinner? No this is a ✨️feast for a lifetime✨️
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Hello kind sir, I'm so glad you never met me
You're my first one, so forgive me if it's messy
Just to be fair, I admit that I'm scared
And sorry for what I must do
Best not to talk 'cause you'll kill the mood around you
Just close your eyes and be lucky that I found you
No one will know, okay, here goes
It's easy as one, two, three
Good afternoon miss, you are my second victim
First one was trouble, not to worry 'cause I fixed him
Shhhh, not a word 'cause you won't be heard
When I have your life in my hands
Just know that what I am doing is part of a plan
I will connect with as many souls as I can
And the soul that controls me, the one I should know
Must see my work here, which means you have to go
Surely you could understand
Haven't you been in love on the edge
Where there's no turning back?
Just the thought of it can take you to some new dimension
So you do what you can just to get his attention
It drives you to boil, right up 'til you spill
It could drive you to bliss
It could drive you to kill...
Sometimes I feel like I'm living in a circus
Clown with a tear in a tent that isn't working
All work no play, day after day
'Til I have a life in my hands
Good evening gents, step right up into my circus
I'm the ringmaster and this is where the work is
Goodbye, you're done, do as he does
To lead him right into my heart
If he could see me now
He'd know he's not alone
This trail of breadcrumbs I'm making
Leading him right to my home
If he were with me now
Then love could be the twist
We could be together
In a world where we'd exist
We could be together
In a world where we'd exist
Sometimes I feel like I'm living in a circus
Sometimes, I'm in control
"You look so cute when you think you have a chance to not be mine."
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It's such a cruel world, you love someone and this someone loves somebody else yet that somebody doesn't love this someone.
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That's the exact look they mean when they say "Don't look at me with those eyes".
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It's too bad, I still dream of the things that we could have been just so I wake up to a reality you forced on me.
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'I don't understand, it just hurts, it hurts a lot' is what my heart keep repeating over and over, he's begging me to do what I shouldn't do, what I know will only make me feel overly pathetic after.. I know he wish we still together but how can he? How can my heart be such a fool? Yet I can't be too harsh with him he's already broken enough.. So I softly tell him 'baby, it's alright, don't you cry anymore, it's late now, won't you sleep? We already said it's goodbye.. sleep, sleep tight, I'll wake you up when you're healed' then I go and beg my brain to stop reminding me of the ghost of our memories so my heart could go into a deep slumber away from all those emotions that keep breaking him again and again.
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December 26
Hello my north star, I don't really know what to tell you this year, it's funny because I've a lot to say.. Maybe I'll never see you again or maybe I'll see you through each passing person in my life, who knows? I wish we could sit together once again in such a lovely day where I could paint you with my love and shower you with compliments about how pretty you look and how much I love your hair or your new perfume. but let's settle with this for now, it's cold, let's play a song, smoke a cigarette and gaze upon the night, the sky looks as beautiful as I remember when I saw it through your eyes..
I hope you are living through it better than me, it's not nice to share everything with someone only to turn to strangers after, I mean it only leaves a hole inside, how does it feel? It feels like everything and nothing at the same time, to have them as your safe place, considering them as best friends, lovers and family at the same time was nice while it lasted.. But what about after..? I really thought we had it all until everything vanished.
I didn't mean to give that much into it, I didn't mean to turn the way I am.. But what happened and what I felt.. Turned me into a mess of numbness, I don't even know what to be mad at anymore, them? Or myself?
Why must we suffer? Why must we be drowning in pain? When we can just be holding each other in a warm embrace, listening to music with a cigarette in hand..
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