xkcd

27 Oct 2017 17:35

'I should make a list of all the things I could be trying to optimize, prioritized by ... well, I guess there are a few different variables I could use. I'll create a spreadsheet ...'

xkcd

25 Oct 2017 17:30

'It also helps with negotiation. "Look, if it were up to me, *I'd* accept your offer, but my swarm of autonomous killer cells literally can't be reasoned with. It's out of my hands!"'

xkcd

23 Oct 2017 17:30

'I started off with countless problems. But now I know, thanks to COUNT(), that I have "#REF! ERROR: Circular dependency detected" problems.'

xkcd

20 Oct 2017 06:05

'If you want to evenly space them, it's easiest to alternate between the Arctic and Antarctic. Some people just go to the Arctic twice, near the equinoxes so the visits are almost 6 months apart, but it's not the same.'

xkcd

18 Oct 2017 15:20

'The 1919 Great Boston Molasses Flood remained the deadliest confectionery containment accident until the Canadian Space Agency's 2031 orbital maple syrup delivery disaster.'

xkcd

16 Oct 2017 16:25

'Our experts have characterized the ecological impact of this trend as "adorable."'

xkcd

13 Oct 2017 13:25

'A schism between the pro-panhandle and anti-panhandle factions eventually led to war, but both sides spent too much time working on their flag designs to actually do much fighting.'

xkcd

11 Oct 2017 16:45

'It's like I've always said--people just need more common sense. But not the kind of common sense that lets them figure out that they're being condescended to by someone who thinks they're stupid, because then I'll be in trouble.'

xkcd

09 Oct 2017 15:35

'I had some important research to do on proposed interstellar space missions, basketball statistics, canceled skyscrapers, and every article linked from "Women in warfare and the military in the 19th century."'

xkcd

06 Oct 2017 13:40

'My theory is that most humans have been colonized with alien mind-control slugs that hold the earbuds for them, and the ones who can't wear earbuds are the only surviving free ones.'

xkcd

04 Oct 2017 08:40

'And yet I have no trouble believing that the start of the 2016 election was several decades ago.'

xkcd

02 Oct 2017 11:40

'"Crowdsourced steering" doesn't sound quite as appealing as "self driving."'

xkcd

29 Sep 2017 13:05

'Contains the active ingredients from all competing cold medicines, plus the medicines for headaches, arthritis, insomnia, indigestion, and more, because who wants THOSE things?'

xkcd

27 Sep 2017 16:20

'They always try to explain that they're called 'solar physicists', but the reporters interrupt with "NEVER MIND THAT, TELL US WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE SUN!"'

xkcd

25 Sep 2017 13:45

'I tried converting the prices into pizzas, to put it in more familiar terms, and it just became a hard-to-think-about number of pizzas.'

xkcd

27 Oct 2017 17:35

1908. "Credit Card Rewards"

xkcd

25 Oct 2017 17:30

1907. "Immune System"

xkcd

23 Oct 2017 17:30

1906. "Making Progress"

xkcd

20 Oct 2017 06:05

1905. "Cast Iron Pan"

xkcd

18 Oct 2017 15:20

1904. "Research Risks"

xkcd

16 Oct 2017 16:25

1903. "Bun Trend"

xkcd

13 Oct 2017 13:25

1902. "State Borders"

xkcd

11 Oct 2017 16:45

1901. "Logical"

xkcd

09 Oct 2017 15:35

1900. "Jet Lag"

xkcd

06 Oct 2017 13:40

1899. "Ears"

xkcd

04 Oct 2017 08:40

1898. "October 2017"

xkcd

02 Oct 2017 11:40

1897. "Self Driving"

xkcd

29 Sep 2017 13:05

1896. "Active Ingredients Only"

xkcd

27 Sep 2017 16:20

1895. "Worrying Scientist Interviews"

xkcd

25 Sep 2017 13:45

1894. "Real Estate"