xkcd

28 Apr 2025 23:55

'It's important to learn the moves that take you into the vortex, but it's best not to study vortex itself too closely. Even grandmasters who have built up a tolerance lose the ability to play for a few hours after studying it.'

xkcd

25 Apr 2025 17:35

'Rümeysa Öztürk was grabbed off the street in my town one month ago.'

xkcd

24 Apr 2025 01:25

'After initial tests created a series of large holes in the wall of the lab, the higher-power Scanning Tunneling Tennis Ball Microscope project was quickly shut down.'

xkcd

21 Apr 2025 17:10

''Wow, that must be why you swallow so many of them per year!' 'No, that's spiders. You swallow WAY more ants.''

xkcd

19 Apr 2025 04:40

'The biggest expense was installing the mantle ducts to keep the carbonate-silicate cycle operating.'

xkcd

17 Apr 2025 08:35

'Our anti-de Sitter club is small at the moment, but I've started corresponding with the conformal field theory people.'

xkcd

15 Apr 2025 07:05

'When you worry that you're missing out on something by not making both choices simultaneously by quantum superposition, that's called phomo.'

xkcd

11 Apr 2025 19:30

'I have to pay with paper money.'

xkcd

09 Apr 2025 22:00

'NOTIFICATION: Now dismissing a head of the Notification Hydra… NOTIFICATION: Success! You have dismissed a head of the Notification Hydra!'

xkcd

08 Apr 2025 01:50

'[later] I don't get why our pizza slices have such terrible reviews; the geotextile-infused sauce gives the toppings incredible slope stability!'

xkcd

05 Apr 2025 04:35

'We haven't actually seen a star fall in since we invented telescopes, but I have a list of ones I'm really hoping are next.'

xkcd

03 Apr 2025 03:30

'If you have an old phone in a drawer, and you listen very carefully, you can occasionally hear the occasional tap of an emitted SIM card hitting the side of the drawer as the phone transmutes to a lower-end model.'

xkcd

01 Apr 2025 04:40

'Most properties can only boast INDOOR heated floors.'

xkcd

29 Mar 2025 02:45

'There has long been debate about Big Bird's species, with some experts claiming he was a canary, but recent genetic analysis places him firmly in Cariamiformes.'

xkcd

26 Mar 2025 20:55

''Is it worth anything?' 'I dunno, is the answer to that question worth another $5?''

xkcd

28 Apr 2025 23:55

3082. "Chess Position"

xkcd

25 Apr 2025 17:35

3081. "PhD Timeline"

xkcd

24 Apr 2025 01:25

3080. "Tennis Balls"

xkcd

21 Apr 2025 17:10

3079. "Air Fact"

xkcd

19 Apr 2025 04:40

3078. "Anchor Screws"

xkcd

17 Apr 2025 08:35

3077. "de Sitter"

xkcd

15 Apr 2025 07:05

3076. "The Roads Both Taken"

xkcd

11 Apr 2025 19:30

3075. "Anachronym Challenge"

xkcd

09 Apr 2025 22:00

3074. "Push Notifications"

xkcd

08 Apr 2025 01:50

3073. "Tariffs"

xkcd

05 Apr 2025 04:35

3072. "Stargazing 4"

xkcd

03 Apr 2025 03:30

3071. "Decay Chain"

xkcd

01 Apr 2025 04:40

3070. "Orogeny"

xkcd

29 Mar 2025 02:45

3069. "Terror Bird"

xkcd

26 Mar 2025 20:55

3068. "Rock Identification"