Funtiply ™

26 Dec 2017 05:54

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?

Claustrophobic

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

25 Dec 2017 05:25

Paid £50 for a Sony 4K HD television today.

The only fault with it was that the volume was stuck on maximum.

Still, for that kind of money, I couldn't turn it down.

#writtenshit #puncity #humortales

Funtiply ™

23 Dec 2017 08:38

I used a great performance enhancing product during sex with my girlfriend last night.



I wore a blindfold

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

22 Dec 2017 06:18

I was at the pet store yesterday and the young salesgirl approached me and asked if I needed help with my Christmas shopping ?

"I'm really interested in these," I said, pointing at the cages of bunny rabbits.

"Ohh, that's so cute," she said, "A gift for your son, or daughter ?"

"No, my python."

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

22 Dec 2017 06:17

You're pun-ished.

I'm sorry. Couldn't help it.

#puncity

Funtiply ™

19 Dec 2017 07:27

Every Christmas I'd come running downstairs to the big pile of presents and start unwrapping them as fast as I could. Sometimes there would be fights over who had the best toys but we would all make up later and sit down to have a three hour lunch before watching TV for the rest of the day.

I really miss working at the Royal Mail sorting office.

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

18 Dec 2017 06:47

The police phoned me to tell me my wife was in hospital.

"How is she?" I asked.

"Very critical," replied the officer.

"What's she fucking complaining about now?" I asked.

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

18 Dec 2017 06:45

What's the difference between snow man and snow woman?

Snow balls.

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

16 Dec 2017 07:57

A husband and wife stepped up to view the body of his mother-in-law. As he began to cry, his wife punched him and said: Why are you crying, you never liked my mother anyway. I know he replied, I thought I saw her move!

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

16 Dec 2017 07:53

Irony
(n.) Drawing trees on a paper with a wooden pencil.

#writtenshit #hipdict

Funtiply ™

14 Dec 2017 16:42

🗣 Best channels you should join today.
Here is the list👇

🐍 @desimovies
Latest and requested movies for free!

🐍 @AndroGamers
ANDROID iOS PSP PREMIUM GAME MODS & APPS !!

🐍 @mp3full
The best music albums

🐍 @mfmixdub
All HINDI Dubbed / Multi-Audio Movies

🐍 @dubbedmovies
Download your favourite dubbed movies in Tamil Hindi Telugu languages

🐍 @mfmixebooks
All Ebooks - Novels, Magazine, Comic, Medical, Audio books

🐍 @sickjokes
Crack your ribs everyday. Laugh every second.

🐍 @Best_MusicBox
Latest Songs

🐍 @tvseriesparadise
Download free television programs here.

🐍 @WhenGIF
Funny GIFs clips pics

🐍 @thinkpositivewords
Daily Get Positive Inspiration, motivation quotes with pictures

🐍 @hackersworldunite
Learn hacking tricks become a world class elite hacker today

🐍 @BlackWhitePhotography
Black-and-white photos of the world

🐍 @LatestSongs
Only The Best Music

🐍 @PrimeApk
Download Unlimited Paid Apps and Games For Free.

🐍 @killernetarena
Get unlimited internet free forever

🐍 @MFMixEnglish
OLD to LATEST Your Ultimate Source for English Flavour Movies

🐍 @mfmixsouth
Ultimate Source for Malayalam, Kannada, Telugu & Tamil Movies

🐍 @InspiringImages
The Best Channel for Most Inspiring Images

🐍 @winhacks
Beginners Guide On Hacks Pro Hacks And Tutorials. Android + Computer

🐍 @BeautifulGirlsTG
Tips for your skin, makeup, fashion, and more

🐍 @premiumapks
Download unlimited premium android apps and games for free

🐍 @ONLYKINGCALL
stock market lovers dont loose ur hard earn money join us now

🐍 @books_and_magazines
Best & usefull books&magazines only on this chanel

🐍 @funtiply
Pun-tastic memes and memes-merising puns. Only here!

🐍 @tricksinfo
Free paid course, premium acc,tech news,hacking tuts & much

🐍 @Motive
Motivation Guaranteed - Get Your Daily Dose Of Motivation and Inspiration

🐍 @indianfilms
Indias top rated movies uploading channel join fast more fun

🐍 @WMR_FRESHHITS
Best Telegram Channel For Downloading Latest Movies In HD Quality

🐍 @smartphonesandelectronics
Be informed about all genuine electronics for sale.

🐍 @DailyMinionQuotes
Suprport Minions! Join for Funny and Cute Minion Quotes!

🐍 @PopcornMedia
Latest Movies in All Languages

🐍 @onlinejobske
Tips to make money online posted here

🐍 @e4entertainment
World of Movies N Entertainments

_____________________
JOIN TO PROMOTE YOUR CHANNEL
➡️ @promote_it 14-Dec-2017

Funtiply ™

13 Dec 2017 13:23

A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood-curdling scream is heard coming from the bathroom.A few minutes after that, another loud scream echo's through the bar. The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate what the drunk is screaming about. The bartender yells, "What's all the screaming about in there? You're scaring my customers!" The drunk responds, "I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my balls." The bartender opens the door and looks in. You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

13 Dec 2017 13:19

Somebody complimented on my driving today, they left a note saying ' parking fine'.

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

12 Dec 2017 07:07

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in."OK, follow me" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him. Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him. "Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked. "Yes, Yes, Yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy. "Good" said the bat, "Because I sure as hell didn't!"

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

12 Dec 2017 06:57

We all have our unique handwriting even though we were all taught to write the same way.

#writtenshit #showerthoughts

Funtiply ™

26 Dec 2017 05:20

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward
his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating,"Why did you
have to die? Why did you have to die?'

The first man approached him and said,"Sir. I don't wish to interfere with your private grief. But this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child?A parent?'

The mourner took a moment to collect himself. Then replied."My
wife's first husband. "

#writtenshit #humortales

Funtiply ™

24 Dec 2017 11:32

💡💡💡 Best channels are out for this week, Do join them !!💡💡💡

Main list D1:

🚨@funtiply
Pun-tastic memes and memes-merising puns. Only here!

🚨@WMR_FRESHHITS
Best Telegram Channel For Downloading Latest Movies In HD Quality

🚨@xdapirates
Most popular & Fast exclusive paid apps channel in telegram

🚨@android_lifes
GET PREMIUM APPS, GAMES, WALLPAPERS MUSIC AND MUCH MORE

🚨@stayawesomee
If you want to feel awesomatic come here and stay awesome

🚨@NasleHipHop
The number one source for all of hip hop today

🚨@RealMetalHeads
Greatest and Latest of Metal, Rock, Blues and Jazz

🚨@bfcanal
LEARN ENGLISH WITH FUNNY STUFF AND MUCH MORE

🚨@onlinejobske
How to make money online posted here

🚨@RealRelationship
Real Relationship Advice,Rules ,Goal awesome cute couple Pictures

🚨@freecoccr
Free Gems for Coc and CR ,Free Hacking Tricks , Free accounts

🚨@CINEMAZONE
Best Place for Latest HD Movies (via HindiHDmovies)

🚨@musehub
The best channel for fresh tunes and videos .

🚨@LooTRanGeR
Paid Apps, Hacked Account, Android, ioS and Windows Hack Tricks

🚨@popcine
Get the latest tunes, soundtracks and fresh albums everyday

https://t.me/joinchat/BhENlkHdQnr2-UdYHZwp2w

Funtiply ™

23 Dec 2017 08:36

That's why I'm single.

Funtiply ™

22 Dec 2017 06:17

What really happened...

Funtiply ™

20 Dec 2017 02:42

I mean... Yeah.. No.. Yeah...

Funtiply ™

18 Dec 2017 13:01

Feminists now a days...

Funtiply ™

18 Dec 2017 06:45

Why'd the duck get arrested?

He was selling quack.

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

17 Dec 2017 08:04

♨️♨️♨️ Here are the best channels, we've come across this week!!!♨️♨️♨️

Main List D1

💠@funtiply
Pun-tastic memes and memes-merising puns. Only here!

💠@teen_zone
Get funny gifs, XXX comics and amazing wallpapers join

💠@tricksinfo
Free paid course, premium acc,tech news,hacking tuts & much

💠@DreamersvsAchieverss
Join us for daily motivation and LuxuryLife Images.

💠@indianfilms
Indias top rated movies uploading channel join fast have fun

💠@A_perfectdaytogetturnedOn
The best channel for hot music, movies and series archives.

💠@stayawesomee
If you want to feel awesomatic come here and stay awesome

💠@android_lifes
GET PREMIUM APPS, GAMES, WALLPAPERS MUSIC AND MUCH MORE

💠@xdapirates
Most Popular & Fast Exclusive Paid Apps Channel in Telegram

💠@RealMetalheads
Greatest and Latest of Metal, Rock, Blues and Jazz

💠@FunAddicted
Memes, funny (at least for us) photos, and GIFs

💠@bfcanal
LEARN ENGLISH WITH FUNNY STUFF AND MUCH MORE

💠@onlinejobske
Tips to make money online posted here

💠@AllHDmovies
All HD movies links are available in all languages...

💠@TopQuotesForYou
Love, Fun, Facts, Motivation, Short Stories and much more Quotes.

https://t.me/joinchat/BhENlkHdQnr2-UdYHZwp2w

Funtiply ™

16 Dec 2017 07:54

I was going to make a joke about garbage collectors, but it's already bin done.

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

15 Dec 2017 09:13

This is how all the epic fights start!

Funtiply ™

13 Dec 2017 13:23

@CuriosityTea_Official
Presents you the Best channels of this week are!
_⏬⏬__________

✴️ @AmazingFacts012
Best and latest facts on telegram.

✴️ @FactsFever
Daily dose of amazing and mind boggling facts

✴️ @bestwallpapes
the best wallpapers and profie pics

✴️ @HipHop_Stoners
Best HipHop/Rap Music HERE

✴️ @LakeofPain
Latest and the Greatest Albums in Rock and Metal Scene

✴️ @ExpertAdvice self development at ease with experts.

✴️ @MagazinesDaily best english magazines.

✴️ @Discos
New Albums Release 2017

✴️ @VipBass
Only Light Musics And High Bass

✴️ @onlinejobske
Tips to make money online here

✴️ @MoviesNowW
For latest Movies. Request you favorite movies

✴️ @JewishMedia
Get viral pictures, videos, humor, & other entertainment-related media

✴️ @TravelTG
Travel and tourism

✴️ @WhenGIF
Funny GIFs clips pics

✴️ @Lexicon
"Step by Step" is an interesting method of learning English language

✴️ @BlackWhitePhotography
Black-and-white photos of the world

✴️ @In_Gym
Subscribers send them photos from the gym

✴️ @Best_MusicBox
Latest Songs

✴️ @AliExpressGIF
GIF related the most unique things from China

✴️ @AcademyOfMan
The fastest growing Telegram channel about mens style

✴️ @funtiply
Pun-tastic memes and memes-merising puns. Only here!

✴️ @AmEnglish
ENGLISH is a colorful language... Learn to use it CORRECTLY.

✴️ @Mallu_Movies
Best Channel To Download Your Favorite Movie In HD Quality

✴️ @Mallu_Rockers
All Language HD movies Here

✴️ @MM_New
First On Telegram  & Latest 400MB Movies

✴️ @teen_zone
Get best funny gifs, daily quotes and amazing wallpapers join

✴️ @InspiringThoughts
Join for most Inspiring Videos, Audios and messages

✴️ @InspiringImages
The Best Channel for Most Inspiring Images

✴️ @apps_and_more
Anything IT, apps, softwares, movies and more

✴️ @IntegratedThoughts
Motivational, Inspirational, movie, anime, great personalities Quotes

✴️ @Curiosity_tea
Enrich you knowledge with Curious Q N A

_⏫⏫____________
Join 👉 @Air_Promotion

Funtiply ™

13 Dec 2017 13:20

Google is useless. I searched for lighters and all I got was 10,000 matches.

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

13 Dec 2017 13:18

Happens all the time.

Funtiply ™

12 Dec 2017 06:57

What do you get when you cross a pig and a dinosaur?

Jurassic Pork.

#writtenshit #puncity #wordplay

Funtiply ™

11 Dec 2017 08:42

Police officer talks to a driver: Your tail light is broken, your tires must be exchanged and your bumper hangs halfway down. That will be 300 dollars.
 -
Driver: Alright, go ahead. They want twice as much as that at the garage.

#humortales